Imago Leadership Consulting

December 15, 2025

The way of a fool is right in his own opinion, but the one who listens to advice is wise.
Proverbs 12:15 (NET)

A fool takes no pleasure in understanding but only in disclosing what is on his mind.
Proverbs 18:2

Do you see a person who is wise in his own opinion? There is more hope for a fool than for him.
Proverbs 26:12

When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.
Proverbs 11:2

I recently completed a blog series titled “The Big 10 Culture Killers of Effective Leadership Teams.” One of the culture killers that I wrote about, The Stunted Mirror, describes how leaders put more stock in their own intuitions and opinions than in wise counsel. As a result, they become myopic, establishing idealized standards for their teams and organizations that are unrealistic and unattainable, and that violate the creative genius of their diverse team members. The book of Proverbs has a less flattering way of describing such leaders: fools! I’m sure we can all think of at least one leader who fits this bill. Perhaps we have been this leader at one time or another.

I was quite surprised to read the following excerpt from Thomas à Kempis’s 15th-century devotional classic, The Imitation of Christ: 

On Being Prudent in What We Accept and Do
It is not good to be taken in by every word or impulse that comes our way, but consider the thing prudently and thoughtfully in order not to offend God. Because we are frail we are always ready to believe the worst of people. Those who seek perfection realize that human nature is weak and prone to spread the evil word.

It is wise, therefore, to act slowly, not to trust entirely our own opinions, or to accept every tale and quickly pass it along to the next one. Seek advice from a wise person of good conscience and be instructed by that person rather than follow your own way. A good life will make you wise in the ways of God and will broaden your experience. If you are humble and submissive to God’s will, you will have peace in all you do. (Clare L. Fitzpatrick, ed. New Jersey: Catholic Book Publishing Co., 1993, p. 25)

It seems the good monk has the idea of The Stunted Mirror long before I did! OK, I’ll give you this one, Brother Thomas.

But the ancient wisdom of God’s Word precedes both of us. The proverbs above present a picture of a person who is not overly enamored with their own ideas, opinions, or interpretations of others. But in humility, this person seeks understanding and cherishes the wise counsel of trusted others. In fact, the proverbs imply that wisdom is not an inherently internal quality. The wise person is not necessarily the one who knows everything. Instead, it is the humble person who seeks wisdom and is not ashamed to be a learner, to ask questions, to acknowledge not knowing, and to pursue it.

In his insightful book, A Teachable Spirit (Zondervan, 2025), author and theologian A. J. Swoboda asserts that we can and should learn from anyone: experts, strangers, the dead, children, parents, secular culture, and even our enemies. He says, “Christian maturity, in part, comes alongside accepting the frustrating fact that none of us have arrived at a full understanding of truth…. Following Jesus entails a recognition that we do not see clearly [1 Cor. 13:12]. This can too often be forgotten. When arrogance colors Christians’ discipleship, it paves the way for miles and miles of pain and frustration for everyone around them.” It seems that humans, as persons made in God’s image with inherent dignity and worth, attain their full potential only through humility and a teachable spirit. Jesus agrees: “Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth” (Matt. 5:5).

Swoboda highlights a crucial insight from Alvin Toffler’s 1970 book, Future Shock: “The illiterate of the twenty-first century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.” I believe that our teams, organizations, and missions can rise to the level of their leaders’ teachability. Those who are wise in their own eyes, who cannot “learn, unlearn, and relearn,” will become a glass ceiling for what a team could truly do together if the leader got out of its way. The following examen questions, if a leader asks him or herself regularly and answers honestly, can be a barometer of and a preventative against their own stunted mirrors.

1. Where, today, did I assume my perspective was the whole truth rather than seeking deeper understanding?
2. Did I genuinely listen to the counsel, insights, or concerns of others, or did I merely wait for my turn to speak?
3. In what situation did pride shape my decisions, expectations, or reactions? What would humility have looked like instead?
4. Whose wisdom did I ignore, overlook, or fail to pursue today, and what kept me from seeking their perspective?
5. How did I practice the discipline of learning, unlearning, or relearning, and where did I resist it?